BEAUTY IN THE BREAKDOWN
Oh yes, for sure, there will be heartbreak! And you will learn to get out of your head and into your immediate embodied experience, coming out of mental stories and conclusions, and contacting the raw energy of the here-and-now, directly feeling the devastation of your dreams rather thanintellectualising everything away, letting the grief, anger and sorrow of millennia surge through your pores, rather than dismissing it all as an 'illusion', or distracting yourself with fresh dreams.
All your preconceived notions of 'enlightenment'will shatter into a million pieces, your happy ideas of 'spiritual awakening' will not survive this, oh no! You will be forced into a face-to-face encounter with life, without the comfort of mummy and daddy, without the shield of belief, without the protection of ego, without the bullshit security of fixed reference points.
Even your most beloved spiritual gurus and philosophers will no longer be of any use.The raw pleasure and the pain of it, unfiltered, at last! No longer numb, you will be as softly vulnerable as you were in the beginning, before you knew right and wrong, good and bad, God and the devil.At first, this will be terrifying, this total reliance on inner authority, this absolute openness to experience, but you will learn to trust the path of no path at all, and you will make your nest in the warm bosom of insecurity.And everything will be held in the most profound silence.
Oh yes, for sure, there will be heartbreak! Yet therewill be joy, too, the likes of which you've only ever dreamed about!
- Jeff Foster
